This picture was taken right before we left for another pastorate. Life is ever changing and nothing should be taken for granted. I hope this blog today will help you see the significance of the little things and the big things in life.
"When you walk to the edge of the light that you have known, and you step into the darkness of the unknown. One of two things will happen. Either there will be something solid for you to stand on, or God will give you wings to fly." ~Patrick Owenton
The above quote was given to me at a "Shepherding the Shepherd" minister's family retreat in WV. At the time, I never knew how many times during life I would refer to this quote. Life has it's ups and downs, and at times it is never easy. There are times when we have gone through changes in life that we have found ourselves stepping onto something solid, and there are times we found ourselves with wings.
5 years ago we found ourselves in the darkness of the unknown and God gave us wings during this time. Mark was taken to Rex Hospital in Raleigh with a swollen hurting leg. The diagnoses was blood clots. I say clots, because there were many. Over 2 dozen in his lungs and too many in his legs to count. That September night in the ER my life flashed before me and then stopped. As the ER doctor so eloquently put the situation, "this is a grave and serious situation.". Then turned to leave us in our own shock. My heart felt heavy and alone, and I was scared for my husband. I left Mark alone to go and call people to let them know the situation. As I went through the double doors of the ER tears came gushing down my face. I made my calls, and tired to compose myself as I went back to be with Mark. ICU was our destination for the next 4 days at Rex. I left briefly to get things he needed only to be called back. He had a clot moving and heading straight for his heart. The verdict...he could die in the next 24 hours. They shared this news with only me, so I had the sole responsibility of shouldering this burden alone. To hear that the person that you love more than life itself might die is a heart wrenching experience. The clot stopped at his knee and looked to be dissolving. Things started to look up. Mark's ICU nurse was a pastor's wife, and she told me that during that time when the clot was moving never had she felt the presence of the Lord so strongly in a room. Only through God's mercy and grace do you survive this, because statically less than 5% do survive. During our 7 day stay at Rex, we found out that Mark has Factor 5 disease. A disease that just manufactures blood clots. Blood thinner would now be a life long friend. Over the next several weeks, God removed our wings and gave us something solid to stand on once again. Family and friends rallied around us, and our hearts swelled with the love we felt. Most of all, we felt the love of God. Through it all He never left us nor forsaken us. He stayed so close that you could feel His arms enveloping you as we struggled with this new unknown territory. His presence was so strong that others felt it as well. His mercy and grace were magnified through this time in our lives.
5 years have passed and for someone that shouldn't be living, Mark looks fantastic. Why did he go through all this? We don't have the answer. Only God knows the why. I know that our marriage grew even tighter and little things are never taken for granted anymore. The "it happens to other people" thoughts never cross our minds anymore, because it did happen to us. Is Mark lucky to be alive...NO, he is blessed to be alive. Luck is a game of chance, and it wasn't by chance that Mark survived...it was purely by Divine intervention by the Master Physician.
Life since then hasn't always been easy. At times we find ourselves standing on something solid and other times we find ourselves with wings. Through it all we have a God that loves us and sees us through the darkness of the unknown.
The above quote was given to me at a "Shepherding the Shepherd" minister's family retreat in WV. At the time, I never knew how many times during life I would refer to this quote. Life has it's ups and downs, and at times it is never easy. There are times when we have gone through changes in life that we have found ourselves stepping onto something solid, and there are times we found ourselves with wings.
5 years ago we found ourselves in the darkness of the unknown and God gave us wings during this time. Mark was taken to Rex Hospital in Raleigh with a swollen hurting leg. The diagnoses was blood clots. I say clots, because there were many. Over 2 dozen in his lungs and too many in his legs to count. That September night in the ER my life flashed before me and then stopped. As the ER doctor so eloquently put the situation, "this is a grave and serious situation.". Then turned to leave us in our own shock. My heart felt heavy and alone, and I was scared for my husband. I left Mark alone to go and call people to let them know the situation. As I went through the double doors of the ER tears came gushing down my face. I made my calls, and tired to compose myself as I went back to be with Mark. ICU was our destination for the next 4 days at Rex. I left briefly to get things he needed only to be called back. He had a clot moving and heading straight for his heart. The verdict...he could die in the next 24 hours. They shared this news with only me, so I had the sole responsibility of shouldering this burden alone. To hear that the person that you love more than life itself might die is a heart wrenching experience. The clot stopped at his knee and looked to be dissolving. Things started to look up. Mark's ICU nurse was a pastor's wife, and she told me that during that time when the clot was moving never had she felt the presence of the Lord so strongly in a room. Only through God's mercy and grace do you survive this, because statically less than 5% do survive. During our 7 day stay at Rex, we found out that Mark has Factor 5 disease. A disease that just manufactures blood clots. Blood thinner would now be a life long friend. Over the next several weeks, God removed our wings and gave us something solid to stand on once again. Family and friends rallied around us, and our hearts swelled with the love we felt. Most of all, we felt the love of God. Through it all He never left us nor forsaken us. He stayed so close that you could feel His arms enveloping you as we struggled with this new unknown territory. His presence was so strong that others felt it as well. His mercy and grace were magnified through this time in our lives.
5 years have passed and for someone that shouldn't be living, Mark looks fantastic. Why did he go through all this? We don't have the answer. Only God knows the why. I know that our marriage grew even tighter and little things are never taken for granted anymore. The "it happens to other people" thoughts never cross our minds anymore, because it did happen to us. Is Mark lucky to be alive...NO, he is blessed to be alive. Luck is a game of chance, and it wasn't by chance that Mark survived...it was purely by Divine intervention by the Master Physician.
Life since then hasn't always been easy. At times we find ourselves standing on something solid and other times we find ourselves with wings. Through it all we have a God that loves us and sees us through the darkness of the unknown.
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Mark on our wedding day. Thankful for the good times and bad times, the sickness and the health and the richer and poorer times that we have been through. Thankful for our 17 years together and look forward to many more years. I love you!!!
Wow Tracey. Thank you for sharing that story. I can't even imagine how hard that must have been for you. God really does carry us sometimes and I know that he carried you and Mark down that road to recovery. What a wonderful reminder!
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